Andy's not so chop-chop-busy-busy, Kev's not bowling and I, comme toujours, am free as Harrison's bird. Omens are ominous, then, for a triplets trip out, a rare event recently. Hold up, lads. Kev knows the perfect spot in his very own stomping ground.

Storks and Trolls are currently showing at the Palace Cinema -- must be half-term -- plus Dr Strange and Daniel Blake. Summat for everyone, much like the over-extensive menu of blue & berry. Get them with their faulty shift key. Aspirational as they clearly are, those cluttered menus still bear the imprint of The Triangle (ex-Froffee Coffee). Odd when they've gone to a lot of trouble to step up a league.

Lower part of the menu contains something to behold, a complex matrix covering every combination of sandwich and doorstep and jacket cross-referenced against all possible fillings. In the near future, such a feature might be better rendered in 3D. Think I was the only one of us to order from Neo-land with my simple request for a BLT. White, wholemeal or granary? Granary, please. Is that the one with bits? Yes, it is the one with bits. Sarnie was perfectly fine with scattered red onion and a light throw of Doritos. Kev would have liked his pumpkin soup to be a tad more chillied, apparently.

Not sure if it's a new thing for these premises to be licensed but we could have had a cheeky glass of white. There's WiFi and a telly showing the news and a plethora of chopping boards pinned to the wall. As you do. Still time for Americanos all round with some slabs of apple & caramel stroke carrot cake to completely wodge us up. No challenge to The Oaks but perfectly OK.

If it was a car -- Volkswagen Polo BlueMotion.
If they were passing by -- Lee Ryan.

How's about we all agree to never ever speak of last week's game again? Alright by everyone? The season must go on, though, and it's time to get back on the horse. Come on, y'all, giddy-up.

Potentially nowhere near as scary as those BT W*lfs are Capel C. That said, they're fresh from a 7-3 victory over our stablemates, the Thunderbirds, so this ain't gonna be easy. Especially when deadblackrubber Peter walks through the door followed by cack-handed Mark and Canterbury Richard. At least Natalie's back with us tonight, currently on a cool one hundred per cent with three out of three. She'll do well to still have that record at the end of the evening. In brief:

• exceptional 3/3 for Natalie, edging past Mark in five ends in the first of her three individual wins
• alright 1/3 for Steve, battling back to sneak past Richard in five
• OK 2/3 for Ed, clawing back from 9-6 down in the fifth end to sweat his way past Peter before being undone by Mark

Over to Natalie and Ed for the doubles with a rare win already guaranteed. First four ends all ended 11-9 before Capel came good. We'll absolutely take that 6-4 win, ta very much. Nice one, Natalie, again!

The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Underground

Dubbed an underground artist, Jay responds by placing 1000 strip lights in a field. Entitled "Beck", it's a fluorescent tube map. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 22, 2016

Feel

Open wallet. Bin the negs. Pore over all 24 6x4s. Feel that hi-gloss finish on every #photograph. Bless you, Bonusprint. #VSS365 @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 21, 2016

Fishing

Fishing in my bag for pen & paper, my copy of Snow Crash fell on her foot.
"You like #SciFi? We're going to be friends."#VSS365 @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 19, 2016

World

This world was untouched, untainted, uncharted. Now, with more ships landing each day, the Martian traffic's a #nightmare. #VSS365 @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 18, 2016

More to follow.

Two games, two draws. That's about as mid-table as you can possibly get, and that'll more than do for the Defiants in our bid to remain afloat in Div 2. Perhaps, though, we haven't yet played the better teams?

Enter BT Wulfs who, if memory serves, usually oscillate between the top two leagues. Not quite good enough to stay up in the premier and yet too good to remain in Div 1. What, then, are they doing down among the likes of us? There's webmaster Steve, who pretty much singlehandedly runs the BT table tennis club, plus big-hitting Trevor and unknown Mark. Should be a hoot. In brief:

• duck for Ed
• duck for Steve
• duck for Helen

Not a lot more to say. Played on a single table at their request, but all our huffin' and puffin' was for nought. Highlight for me was trying to bounce the ball off a wall between games only for said 40mm ball to fly out of the window, a metaphor for the entire evening. Been a while since our last 10-0 drubbing. Never fun.

The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Cork

Dad's will was clear. Up on the bridge, I threw each and every cork over the side. As the flotilla sailed away, I raised a glass. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 8, 2016

Plaque

A dreich Dumbarton. Chris pointed up at the wall:
DAVID BYRNE BORN HERE 1952
"Ah," I said, "I guess that this must be the plaque."@130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 6, 2016

Golf

I don't even like Oscar & Mike, thought Charlie. He turned the Alfa Romeo. I'll buy Juliet dinner at that hotel. Stuff the golf. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 6, 2016

Email

You're the first female
To give me their Gmail
But my billet-doux
Bounced on error 512
"Bad email address"
Now my outlook's a mess@130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 3, 2016

More to follow.

For some years, me and friend Tom have been applying for (free) tickets to go see Later being recorded live. For some years, we've received that familiar let-you-down email saying "We're sorry to let you know that on this occasion you have been unsuccessful." Then, around 6pm on Sep 28th, an email arrived:

CONGRATULATIONS!
Your application has been successful and your e-Tickets are attached.
We look forward to seeing you at the show.

I called Tom. Tom made some calls. Tom couldn't make it. I spoke to G. G considered her work diary. G couldn't make it. I spoke to Jeff. He had some words. Jeff could make it. Game on.

You may know that Later's USP is the fact that it's live, being broadcast on a Tuesday from 10 to 10:30pm. Reading the small print about "we send out more tickets than there are places", we arrived at Maidstone Studios around 6pm to join a queue of fellow punters. Tickets checked, in we trooped to buy a drink and a sandwich in the anonymous waiting room, a sizeable area with not quite enough chairs. Fair bit of waiting and chit-chat before the 8:15pm-ish summons. I'd guess around 200 people were there being called through 50 or so at a time. Brief walk, down a corridor and boom, here's the Later studio. Wow.

I suspect they often play with the layout, but at the moment the audience are shunted into four corners, each dark-clothed group (follow the dress code) arranged on a stepped right-angle podium. All action on the studio floor and all acts present. To our right, James Vincent McMorrow. To our left, Tom Chaplin, him from Keane. Over there, hard-rocking Twin Atlantic. Way over there, Blackberry Smoke, with Madeleine Peyroux perched on a chair. No big names, to be honest, but hey.

With everyone on their marks and us having been schooled in how to applaud, out strolls diminutive Jools (who I guess I last saw in concert with Squeeze about 1986) and the cameras being to roll, 'cos they film an hour-long show first. Bands play their carefully selected numbers, Jools chats with Tom about his drug problem, Twin Atlantic make a noise, and the sounds are all great. There's the odd break for continuity and then the hour is up. Fifteen minutes until we're live, says one of the many young ladies who apparently run the studio floor.

Ten pm, credits music plays over the in-house speakers, and we're off, the array of cameras darting in and out and around Jools and the acts as he calmly works his way through show number 349. Most bands reprise an earlier song, Madeleine does a different jazzy guitar number, and all too soon we're done. Did we record that?, asks the executive producer. Yes, it's confirmed. Studio audience, he says, you may go. Thanks for coming. Shame not to see The National or Kate Tempest or Iggy Pop, but nevermind. Quite the experience, all free, and my application is already in for more tickets.

Yang swims and Natalie netballs hence their limited availability. Bit of a rarity, then, to have both of them turn out tonight, the two of them declaring themselves to be more than a bit rusty.

Freewheeled over Norwich Road, Bramford Lane and Bramford Road to the Con Club for our match against Rosary Yellow. Was late, as usual, so only time for a quick knock before a 7:45 start against dexterous Dave, tempestuous Tony and cursory Clive. In brief:

• poor single for Ed, boo, losing in straight ends to Dave and Tony before finally getting a grip to beat Clive
• fab maximum for "rusty" Natalie, blasting everyone off the table
• fortunate single for Yang, gaining a point when unlucky Tony stretched, pulled a muscle and limped off

Draw already gained, Yang let me and Natalie play the doubles, but the V-men, Dave and Clive, wanted it more, winning 3-0. Another week, another draw.

The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Cloak

Mum insists that I'm the spit of Bruce, her late father, but he towered above me. My grandfather's cloak is too tall for myself. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 30, 2016

Fox

Two of the actors were staying across the bay. I offered to row them across. But who to take first: Claire Goose or Laurence Fox? @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 30, 2016

Marker

"Ok, eyes closed. Do you prefer marker 1?"
I gave the Sharpie a good sniff.
"Or number 2?"
"Not sure," I said. "It's a fine line."@130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 28, 2016

Mars

Jodie's bedroom telescope was trained on Mars. That #spot was new. Was it moving? Nobody believed her. Then they arrived. #VSS365 @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 28, 2016

Grim

With just one wipe on his sleeve, Billy fixed the camera on my phone.
"The problem was...?"
"That's right," he said. "Grim lens."@130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 26, 2016

More to follow.