I'm trying to figure out why it's been a sizeable seven weeks since our last Friday review, back on 12-Dec at the Orwell Crossing. Following Friday we revisited The Oaks to present them with a Best Of Felixstowe award, then, I guess, Christmas/NY happened. NB thanks to MLB for an unsolicited guest review from Dunwich. Nobody much was around at the same time in early January, and certain parties went off-limits for some fine food at the Leaping Hare: they know who they are. My keyboard's clicking but all you hear is blah blah blah.

So it's vamos and allons-y to Ye Olde Wooden Bridge. We've long since done all the coffee shops in Woodbridge, and now it's time to tick off a faster food outlet: we hope it's chips. Sharp left at The Seal into Old Barack Obama Road -- president's parking only -- past the Co-op and left again by the row of shops. Plenty of parking facing a motley assortment of establishments inc. the Balti Balash, an insurance broker, and the Happy Haddock, aka the Cheerful Cod, aka the Pleased Plaice, though really Quality Fish & Chips.

There's kebabs and wraps on offer, but we play safe with the eponymous F&C. Cod for me (c/w 25p Ketchup), custom cooked haddock for Grenvyle. Inside are some interesting old postcards of Woodbridge -- take a house point for relevance -- though I'm slightly perturbed by the sheet in the window headed "Missing Cat". Wise to avoid the battered sausage.

Place is filling up by the time we take away our wrapped offerings. Sun's out and off we head to Petula Clarkville, down by the Riverside then up & over the footbridge. There's a four-sided shelter on the walkway with an unbeatable view of the Tide Mill, yet somehow we contrive to remain in the wind. And boy, is it cold, rapidly cooling both fish and digits, a long way from the post-Melton Fish Bar October warmth of Kingston Fields. Brainwave of mine to head inside for a warming coffee 'n' cake at the Whistlestop and to watch Grenvyle's fingers do the hypercolour shuffle from ultra-violet to infra-pink.

If it was a car -- Peugeot Expert.
If they were passing by -- Danny Baker.

Been a while since we cruised through the first round of the I&D TT KO Cup. For a while we'd known that the next opponents would be from, gulp, the Premier Division. To carry on last time's tortured footy analogy, this is like Southend (us) being drawn away at Chelsea (them). And we know how that turned out.

First time for us at Bentley village hall, home to the be-logo-ed Phoenix Cobras. Modern, light and spacious, so can't blame that. Usually you might find carpet bowls, recorder players or the Scrabble club here in the Ganzoni room: tonight there's one green Sponeta table (Super Compact model) and all eyes on it.

Quality start, the first set of nine singles leaving us one adjusted point up against Jimbo, John and Richard (let's credit whoever works out the individual handicaps for doing a good job). There's loose talk of making up additional points over the three sets of doubles ... at which point it kind of falls apart, losing the first 21-3 and the third 21-1. Not planned.

Downhill from then on, the task becoming ever more unlikely until finally Kev needed to win 21-16 outright in the final end. Not gonna happen with such consistent opposition. We was outclassed, Brian, truth be told. At least we're now free, as they say, to concentrate on the league ...

So you wanna be a boxer, wanna be a champ? Take a lesson from Rampaging Rob, who's clearly laid off the George Foreman grill: now a lightweight (though not in the Alan Sugar sense), he turned in a heavyweight performance to gain his second maximum on the trot. Particularly good bodywork against Defensive Dave, pulling himself off the canvas to land the killer blow in the 15th round. Quite a scalp, beating DD: the bigger they are ... Then, breathing hard, he refused help from his corner, insisting that he was good for another bout which again went the distance.

Maybe Killer Kev accepted a back-hander pre-game, going down far too easily against Bad Boy Basim and thrusting forward his glass chin against Slugger Simon. A tad ring-rusty, he needs more sparring against quality opposition.

Routine win for Bodley Ed v. The Slugger, then punch for punch with a much improved Bad Boy before going down to a cruel TKO. Final bout saw DD briefly down before his inevitable Rocky-style comeback.

All-in tag doubles swung their way -- kerpow -- then ours -- skidoosh -- before ultimate defeat. We coulda been somebody; we coulda been contenders.

Top 10 Signs That It's Too Wet To Bike To Work

1. huge queues at Shell garage due to U-571 stuck between pumps 5 and 6
2. Land Rover owners desperately flicking through handbook to find out what to do in wet weather
3. Kesgrave Fisheries say that "we'll cook it if you can catch it"
4. signs at work amended to say Spaces For Car And Kayak Sharers Only
5. proposed merger of Ipswich pubs The Dove and The Olive Leaf
6. Google maps now offering overlays of satellite, terrain and currents
7. Cumberland Towers besieged by angry mob trying to make it to higher ground
8. Friends of Broomhill Pool issue press release saying "I told you this would happen", later retracted when flooding found to be not limited to Norwich Road area
9. handwritten sign in bike shop says Why Pedal Slow When You Can Pedalo?
10. got the bike rack to myself

Man, that rain was heavy.

Six below when I got in the motor tonight, and there's a (ch)ill wind blowing through our once proud team:

• Andy is first to lay, opening with a solid hand of worsening back pain
• Rob sees the back pain and raises a serious chest infection
• Grenvyle plays his wildcard of ultra-low blood pressure necessitating a 999 home visit on New Year's Day

Naturally, then, it's Ed, Kev and ... "Holby" Grenvyle who drag themselves out into the cold, cold night to kick off the second half of the season. Let's keep this brief: null/nil/nada points for Kev, distracted by (a) that Walker's competition and (b) the thought of a chocolate digestive (winners and guests only), ditto for Grenvyle, though kudos for not passing out, and thankfully an untroubled hat trick for Ed.

And yet another case of shoulda woulda coulda in the doubles. Oh dear, how sad, never mind.

Way, way back in the 90s, before Google, there was very little of worth about Ipswich on what we used to call the world wide web. There was, however, a shiny exception, named Ipsart.

Ipsart was a small but perfectly formed website created by a chap named Jonathan Clift. Disappointed with what he could find about local artists on the web, he came to this creative conclusion:

"So, I thought I'd have a go myself"

Jonathan's site took you on a miniature "grand tour" of public art in the town, from that enigmatic shape on the Civic Drive roundabout to the stained glass at Suffolk College. Each page had a brief description plus photo. Informative & minimal: what more could you need?

Now's an appropriate time for me to pay tribute to the now-retired Ipsart in my own bricky way.

Welcome to IpsartLego.