Yesterday, taking five minutes out from my work in hand — hey, those purdy lights are sapping — I stumbled across a pen portrait, a thumbnail sketch, a vignette, if you will, of me. It turns out that I, EFB, am "50-quid bloke". Near enough, anyway.

This Guardian (what were the chances?) article described how men and women of a certain age, no longer burdened with youth, are now buying more CDs than teenagers, and have consequently become vital to the whole music industry.

You're alternative
So alternative
So individual
You want to be different like everyone else
— Voon, Alternative (1994)

David Hepworth, who I remember from Smash Hits and as a co-presenter of the Whistle Test with Andy Kershaw, defines 50-quid bloke like this (he says, I say):

• big user of the web... shops at Amazon – check!
• loathes Pop Idol – indifferent to it
• wants to keep up – check!
• likes White Stripes, Coldplay and Blur – still working on the Stripes; loved Coldplay's debut, but now too popular?; five Blur CDs sitting on my desk
• persevered with Radiohead – check!
• latest buys are the Stands and Franz Ferdinand – not even heard of the former; latter already on my Amazon wishlist
• given up on Radio 1 – I left with Lamacq
• listens to Radio 4 – nope; I'm with Five Live
• likes less cosy bits of Radio 2, like Jonathan Ross – check!
• adores DVD – nope; still not got a player
• possibly has an iPod – had a demo last week of a friend's iPod mini, fresh back from NY; drool
• favourite recent film is Lost In Translation – would be if we could organise ourselves a babysitter
• got the High Fidelity chip embedded in his brain – check!
• university-educated – check!
• reads a broadsheet – check!
• raved about Beevor's Stalingrad – nope; doesn't appeal
• not a great telly-watcher – partly true
• loves Simpsons and The Office – check!
• will miss Friends – Frasier, yes; Friends, no!
• he may be a she – some Wasp Factory deal happening here?

Frighteningly more hits than misses in that list. But I fail to pass the one big test, not yet having passed my 40th birthday; got a couple of years left before facing that mental hurdle. Now, where did I leave my slippers?

Be seeing you!

Ed